Here's my recording for my IOC
Grading:
Criterion A: 6
I felt that I didn't give a large amount of context about the text in general and I could have referenced the text to support what I was saying more.
Criterion B: 4
I felt like, while I did try to show effect on tone/meaning, it did not translate very well. Also, I needed to show how it affected the reader.
Criterion C: 4
Over all the structure was good, but at times I wasn't very coherent.
Criterion D: 3
I felt like I did communicate my message overall. However, I struggled to find my words sometimes and I paused to think.
Things I would do differently:
Write out my conclusion more carefully
Look more at effect and actually write them down
Here's my pssage and planning:
(I would recommend opening them in a new tab and enlarging them to read)
PS: In lieu of Ms.G's pump up song, I've decided to add my contribution:
I really like the structure and the background that you provided in the beginning of the IOC. I thought you talked slowly and clearly which is very important for oral presentations. It was also cool how you connected almost everything you said to the book as a whole. Overall I thought this was a great presentation and very interesting. Also nice video at the end.
ReplyDeleteI really liked your IOC. You did a great job at providing context of where your passage is from and what was going on it. You also spoke very clearly, like Walter mentioned, which makes your points easier to understand and follow your argument. You had a really good length, and you were also always talking about relevant points like how the tone affects the message.
ReplyDeleteLike Walter and Marisa have said, you did really well with providing context at the start of the IOC. I also thought you did a great job at providing meaningful and coherent analysis of the passage. Whenever you discussed a quote, you made it very clear how it was significant to the text and your argument about the passage. At times it felt a little bit like things were starting to go off on tangents, but if wasn't necessarily a bad thing because you used what you were saying to make a strong argument. I like the way that you incorporated the quotes into your presentation; it felt very natural and didn't break the flow. Listening to this made me feel like it is actually possible to make an IOC coherent and effective.
ReplyDeleteWow! Props to you for actually getting within the time marker and not having any awkward silence! Your IOC was both thoughtful and easy to understand. You did a great job at explaining, as the others have said, and if I hadn't read the book, I still would understand where you were going with the argument. I think that is one of the most important things to do, and you did it pretty effortlessly. I think that you could probably grade yourself a little higher for that. I do agree that you struggled to find your words sometimes, but you're human! Everyone needs time to process! And once you did, your thoughts came out clear and precise. Well done!
ReplyDeleteLike all the others have said, your IOC is super clear and understandable and you did a wonderful job explaining the context. Everything you said served a purpose and contributed to your argument, which is super awesome, because it's really easy to fall victim to throwing in random information to make it longer. I definitely agree with you that writing out a more detailed conclusion could be helpful. Great job!
ReplyDeleteAhahaha you spelled passage 'pssage' like way to go nerd. But that's about all I can say that's actually critical or mean which makes me mad because I love being mean to you. Seriously first try and you hit the ten minute mark?? Like with no pausing or awkward silence you just nailed it and that's so infuriating to me. Anyways, I like that you included your passage and planing and it all seemed structured super well so that probably has something to do with the whole "I'm mango snot and I can talk for 10 minutes with no sweat on the first shot" thing. So good on you girl.
ReplyDeleteya done good
ReplyDeleteEveryone else here has covered a lot of the good stuff in your recording and I really agree that you did well with providing context right from the get go. Also, hardly any pauses?? dang??? I think you cheated. Good job!!
ReplyDelete